My OTHER Daddy

I was at the doctor's office with Darling Daughter (whose gastro-intestinial escapades will not be recorded for posterity). I had already gotten the stink-eye from some of the staff, who thought I qualified for "Crappy Mom of the Year" because I hadn't brought her in at the first sign of trouble. Knowing full well that I would have gotten nominated for "Over protective, get-her-off-the-internet Mom of the Year" if I had brought her in earlier, I mentally flipped them all the bird and carried on my merry way.

Until...

Darling Daughter, dressed in butterfly wings and paisley pants, sat patiently through most of the exam. After tolerating my meaningless conversation with the doctor about her health and well being, she chirped "Momma, I want to go see my other daddy."

Uh....what? I couldn't help myself. I looked at her and asked "Who?" She repeated, several times, that she wanted to see the OTHER daddy today. The doctor had politely averted his eyes at this point, to avoid embarrassing me if my 2.5 year old was really ratting me out for some illicit affair.

Apparently frustrated that I wasn't getting the message, Darling Child escalates her request. "Momma, I want to see my other daddy, you know, the Black Daddy." I swear I heard the doctor laughing at me as he added "adulterer, most likely with multiple partners" to my list of mom-crimes.

I decided that the worst thing I could do was attend to this random request, thereby validating her warped little reality. So I ignored her, and tried to continue my conversation about her diet with the doctor.

The doctor, whom I now suspect is horrified by my affairs with so many different people as to have to identify them according to their race, issued some perscriptions with a bit of a chuckle. As far as I know, the suspicious staff has not yet notified the authorities. I'm hoping I didn't make the list on the doctor's nightly recap to his family..."You'll never believe what this toddler said to her Mom today..."

Husby, to his credit, laughed at the idea that I have multiple Baby Daddies to manage. He merely inquired if the Black Daddy was rich, or could cook...